For those who are unfamiliar with the concept of a hitchhiker’s guide, or who do not understand sarcasm, the primary purpose of this website is humor or parody. While the information here can and should be informative, it should also be taken with a rather large grain of salt.

    Should you find anything in The Guide that you disagree with or in fact know to be false, please do remember the golden rule first laid out in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, “The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.”

The Guide

8 Ways to spot a Karen

One of the unique features of humanity on the planet Earth is the brief emergence of subtypes of human creatures. The human creatures often call these subgroups or stereotypes. While other civilizations throughout the galaxy pride themselves on their ability to remain consistent throughout time, Earthlings are known the galaxy over for being consistently inconsistent…. read more »

Democrats and losing go together like Joe Biden and gaffes

United States Presidential Candidate Joe Biden’s latest controversy illustrates a trend within the democratic party in the United States. In case you awoke this morning from a long hibernation in a cave in the far reaches of the galaxy and were not aware of Uncle Joe’s latest gaffe, the former Vice-President said that if African-Americans… read more »

The Microwave Oven: The best thing since sliced bread

While most civilizations throughout the galaxy use microwave energy for things like communication, navigation, astronomy, and weaponry, the Earth is unique in the fact that most Earthlings associate the term “microwave” with food. It isn’t that humans haven’t deployed microwave energy for the purposes listed above — indeed they have — it is just that… read more »

How to spot an Internet troll

The first thing you need to know about trolls is that they have even more limited cranial capacity than the average human child.

Is the Earth really ‘mostly harmless?’

Initially thought to be “mostly harmless,” the planet Earth is still considered to be of considerably less harm to the civilized galaxy than other planets and civilizations of its size. Though some observers have criticized the inhabitants of the planet, known locally as humans, for their oft-stated belief that they may be alone in the… read more »

Hide your kids, hide your wives, the Murder Hornets are coming

In the midst of the global pandemic on Earth known as the coronavirus, COVID-19, or more colloquially “The ‘Rona,” a new threat to humanity emerged. Known as The Murder Hornet, (or Asian Giant Hornet) this particularly nasty form of bee migrated its way into the continent of North America from Japan, a region of Earth… read more »

Jesus of Nazareth: The God who walked on Earth

Also called Jesus Christ. This is quite possibly the most famous person in the history of the world in human terms. In divine terms, He is the maker of the history of the world, all worlds, and of life the universe and everything. Identity and Birth He was born roughly 2,000 earth years ago give or… read more »

Fox News: Changing your definition of reality

Volumes have been written in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to The Galaxy and The Encyclopedia Galactica about a media outlet on a tiny blue planet on the outskirts of the Milky Way galaxy named after a woodland animal. In fact, the University of Alpha Andromedae, which exists for the sole purpose of training government bureaucrats and… read more »